Selflessness...

I arrived home on Sunday thinking maybe, just maybe I can do this mothering thing after-all. I so often feel weighed down by the many things I need to teach my girls (and protect them from!!) throughout their formative years. I regularly find myself preparing little conversations in my head that I don't expect will occur for several years. Once or twice I have written them down in their journals, but generally, those things I am fearing most one day, will be overtaken by other such fancies the next.

Don't get me wrong, I am not a 'worrier', but I do have a very firm idea of certain characteristics that I want my girls to develop.
For NOW, as my girls are still only babies, what they need most is my TIME. It comes down to one thing, just one little tiny thing... SELFISHNESS. (But then, doesn't everything??)

There is a season for all things, and my time will come. For now, my time belongs to others. I am trying to suppress that little 'voice' that tells ME all the things I need to do for ME to make ME happy. Knowing myself as only I do, selfishness will NOT make me happy. Losing myself in the service of those I love; will!

It is soooo much easier said than done. Changing comes one tiny decision at a time...