Priorities...

I was hanging out the washing the other day while Chloe had a swing and Olivia chatted happily while she played beside me. I took this photo when I was done.



The two large seeds are 'Mum and Dad'. The smaller seeds are the girls (I love how, at one point, the 'Chloe' seed is on top of the 'Mummy' seed!!). As she played, I realised she was acting out an entire 'Family Home Evening'. We sing. We pray. We teach. We play. We eat.

I love that in so many things she does, Olivia reminds me of my priorities. And also, reminds me that sometimes I do get it right. That sometimes, she does catch on to the most important message; that she is loved, that her sister is loved, and that her parents love each other. There is nothing more important than these things.

I am someone who constantly needs reminding of what my priorities are.

Thankyou baby girl.

..

This morning I decided to relinquish a little of the power that I was still trying to hold onto, to the princess. 'What's that' you say, 'I didn't realise you were a control freak/dictator/autoritarian'. Well, neither did I, but this 'giving in' is much harder than I thought.

As a result, Olivia has wet her pants (and subsequently my floor) three times this morning (she didn't want to wear a nappy, or go to the toilet- go figure).

And this is how she wore her hair. In public.




Still, gotta love this kid!!

Selflessness...

I arrived home on Sunday thinking maybe, just maybe I can do this mothering thing after-all. I so often feel weighed down by the many things I need to teach my girls (and protect them from!!) throughout their formative years. I regularly find myself preparing little conversations in my head that I don't expect will occur for several years. Once or twice I have written them down in their journals, but generally, those things I am fearing most one day, will be overtaken by other such fancies the next.

Don't get me wrong, I am not a 'worrier', but I do have a very firm idea of certain characteristics that I want my girls to develop.
For NOW, as my girls are still only babies, what they need most is my TIME. It comes down to one thing, just one little tiny thing... SELFISHNESS. (But then, doesn't everything??)

There is a season for all things, and my time will come. For now, my time belongs to others. I am trying to suppress that little 'voice' that tells ME all the things I need to do for ME to make ME happy. Knowing myself as only I do, selfishness will NOT make me happy. Losing myself in the service of those I love; will!

It is soooo much easier said than done. Changing comes one tiny decision at a time...

who's the DUMMY?

I may have jumped the gun and I feel a little unprepared, but now that it is done, I can't go back.
I don't think it would be an over-reaction to call Olivia a dummy addict. That is, until last night. She is now a recovering addict. It has been 32hours without the beloved dummy.

I put her to bed last night without it and she cried for about half an hour. Realising I had jumped the gun, but definitely not able to go back, I went and got her up, and we googled pictures of babies with dummies, and big kids sleeping without dummies. It was, I thought, successful, though probably belated. We discussed the issue rationally, and she went off to bed. Well, she was still awake and fairly distressed when Justin got home at about 8:30, so after failed negotiations with the princess, we both sat on the floor beside her bed to help her settle. Olivia looked like she had died and gone to heaven. She rested her angelic face on her pillow, and wispered sweet nothings to us (in a voice I wish she would use more often). After a while I left to do my other motherly duties and Justin offered to pull up a pillow on her floor until she fell asleep. She didn't last long in her bed, and they ended up having a snuggle session on her bedroom floor, where she eventually fell asleep.

Words cannot describe how important the relationship between the two of them is to me!
I'm not sure that I am the bad quy, taking away the beloved dummy. I see my role in the situation as the heroine of the hour, facilitating one of those rare 'magic moments' between a Daddy and his princess.

P.s Olivia has gone down for her nap today with a 'broken' dummy (one of the many tips I got in my hour of need). I cut about two thirds off the teet, and asked her if we should just throw it in the bin, as it 'seemed' to be broken. She tried it out a couple of times, and decided she would keep it- good luck I say! She's been asleep for about 2and a half hours now :D

Domestic Bliss?

Yes, I am ashamed to admit, this is the state of my house. There it is. The reason why you have not been invited to my house recently (if indeed this is the case). I am even more ashamed to admit however, it is actually worse than it looks (you can't even see the hommus hand prints all over the furniture here). It used to be so clean. Unfortunately, the standard is slipping and what used to be considered a pigsty, is actually quite tidy.

I remember fondly the days when Olivia first became mobile. She showed such pride in packing away her toys once she was finished playing with them, while I sat beside her, cheering her on through the whole process. She would then go to bed for another couple of hours while I mopped the floor again, or organised the linen press again, or dusted the blinds. You get it.
And now.. I have two children. Great, two little helpers, right? Oh no no no.

Olivia no longer shows such pleasure in these menial tasks. She does, however, enjoy following me around pushing her wagon so I can't hear ANYTHING while talking on the phone. She also enjoys bringing each of her toys out of her bedroom one by one and leaving them in random places throughout the house (story time on the kitchen floor anyone?) She is also VERY aware that when I sit down to feed Chloe, I will not be chasing after her to get the phone while she attempts to dial out, or stop her from doing suicide jumps from my bedhead.

I did actually get some washing done this morning AND if you look very closely, you can see that dinner is on in my new slow cooker (thanks honey). But that's about as far as I got. One can only get so far with my 'one handed cleaning' method. The 'to do' list I have prepared in my head for when the children are asleep is a mile long (and does not include blogging- whoops!).
So I am off to do something more productive!

Oh dear, my plans are shattered. I hear a faint call of 'Om awake Mum.." coming from Olivia's bedroom... ah blow it! I'm taking my girls to the park!

Birthday Girl

How quickly time goes! We were just going to have some family over for her birthday, but she was SO excited that she kept inviting people. "Birthday. Party. Park???" Adorable.
She was looking forward to this day for weeks and weeks. "Not tommorow, but soon... but soon.. but soon..."
In the end it wasn't much of a party really, just some sausages in the park with a pinata (and a whole lot of friends), but she had a ball. I didn't want the day to end- it's the one day of the year that I could shamelessly spoil her rotten!

However, it does mark the 'official' end of baby days for my first born. I already feel such a sence of loss just knowing that I can't hold onto my 'baby' forever. And now she is 2.
2 years old!!
I am so desperate to preserve the memories of my little girl as a baby, because pretty soon memories is all I will have.

Nooo.. STOP growing!!!!

Just a Mum

It has recently come to my attention that, of my high school class mates, I am not the most successful professionally (shock horror- I know!). So, like many before me, I've begun to imagine conversations at my High School reunion going something like this...

CM: "...Oh, but that's just in my spare time, I've recently won a Logie. What do you do?"
ME: "Oh, I'm just a Mum..." (This is where the crowd disperses in the hunt of someone more interesting to talk to.)

And lets be fair, being a Mum is not going to win me a Logie. So with mothers day just passed, I thought I might compile a list of all the things that are GREAT about being a mum (and 'just' a mum).

1. "All that I am or ever hope to be, I owe to my angel Mother." -- Abraham Lincoln. Who ever said this about a sports star, or a rich dentist, or their lawyer, or a famous actor??
2. You always know that children are GENUINE. You definitely know when they aren't happy with you, and can be sure they mean it when they say 'I lub you mummy..". Also, they forgive ridiculously quickly.
3. The more effort I put into the relationships with my children (and I'll throw in husband here too), the more I get back.
4. It's a job I share with the person I love most in the world. So when I talk about my 'job', there is no feigning interest. (Unless he is a very good actor.. hmm could even be worth a Logie).
5. I heard a quote recently form James E Faust that said; "Happiness in marriage and parenthood can exceed a thousand times any other happiness". (Amen to that!!!!)

Ahh.. ok then. Life is good.

(photograph by Deep Grey)